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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23384389">Father Gold</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefalconofthefall/pseuds/thefalconofthefall'>thefalconofthefall</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Pokespe Fairytails [18]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Pocket Monsters SPECIAL | Pokemon Adventures</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Spiritual Pokemon, F/M, Fairy Tale Retellings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 15:07:15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,343</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23384389</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefalconofthefall/pseuds/thefalconofthefall</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>There once lived a man named Gold, who had so many children that many would say are as many as Fletchlings in a garden. Every dad, he and his wife Crystal labored hard to feed all of them, which was barely enough. Unsatisfied with his situation, Gold goes off to meet the Watcher God Zygarde to fix his fortune. But what would he do with such luck?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Crystal/Gold (Pokemon)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Pokespe Fairytails [18]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/596842</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Father Gold</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>It's been almost three years, but Pokespe Fairytails finally gets another addition. Don't expect another one though, because this was just a warm-up for me, and I liked this fairy tale that I wanted to finish it. </p><p>Characters: Father Grumbler (Gold), Grumbler’s wife (Crystal), Holy Man (Zygarde!Emma), Friends (Red, Blue, and Silver), Tavernkeeper (Sun)</p><p>Based off of "Father Grumbler."</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There once lived a man named Gold, who had so many children that many would often say their number is equal to the amount of Fletchlings in a garden. Every day, he and his wife Crystal labored to get the money that barely fulfilled their needs. Both were often tired from the work they had to do, especially Gold, who had the tendency to snap, so much that everyone called him “Father Grumbler.”</p><p> </p><p>After a time of working, he grew bored of the routine, and would often on the first day of the week lay on his bed for a long while, deep in thought on how to get more money. Eventually, the routine became so stultifying, that one day, he decided to look out of the window, which revealed the lively tavern across the street.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Hey, maybe I should go…” </em> he thought as he watched people enter it. “ <em> Better than lying around all day and thinking other ways to pay the rent.” </em></p><p> </p><p>So he got up from his bed, left the empty house, and went to the tavern across the street.</p><p><br/>When he arrived, he heard the chatter of many people, as they eat their meals and drink various kinds of beverages. He scoured through the crowd until his eyes finally landed on the red head of his friend Silver, who was sitting at the very occupied bar, talking with his sister Blue while her husband Red cleaned the counter.</p><p> </p><p>He took a seat next to Silver, who gave him a nod.</p><p> </p><p>“So what do you want Gold?” Blue asked, averting her eyes from her brother.</p><p> </p><p>“A jug of whiskey,” the man replied. The woman nodded, then went to the back to get a bottle.</p><p> </p><p>Red turned towards him, and gave him a big smile. “Hey Gold! Long time no see! How are the kids and Crystal?”</p><p> </p><p>“They’re fine,” he answered.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t you have a family to feed?” Silver asked with a frown.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s getting boring lying around the house when you have a day off,” he said.</p><p> </p><p>“Understandable,” Silver shrugged. “Reason why I travel a lot.”</p><p> </p><p>Blue then appeared with a bottle, and poured some of its contents into a jug. “Enjoy,” she said.</p><p> </p><p>Gold nodded with a grin, and downed the excellent alcohol. He continued to order several more of the drink while having a pleasant chat with his friends, not caring of what he worried hours before. But when night fell and he returned home, he felt the full weight of his bad decisions. He didn’t felt much better than earlier in the day, now that he realized he wasted precious time and money on going to the tavern.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Ugh...I should go visit a god for this,” </em> he thought as he watched the children retreat into their bedrooms. “ <em> Perhaps they would know why everyone has fortune and I don’t.” </em></p><p> </p><p>But which god? The ones that actually control fortune, Xerneas and Death, never stayed in one place for too long unless they were asleep. The Djinn was freed from their prison last he heard, but being a cunning Pokemon as they are, the chances of meeting them were very unfavorable, even more so for a cooperation with no negative consequences. Diancie, the god and their less powerful cousins, were also as cautious, maybe even more. Jirachi was still sleeping, and no one knows where their dwelling was, other than they’re most likely somewhere in Hoenn, and even if he wanted to gamble on that chance, the region was too far for an affordable boat ride. The same can be said for Mew, but instead of being a god who slept for millennia, they loved to wander the world with no trace to be found.</p><p> </p><p>With all of the horrible options ticked away, there left only one.</p><p> </p><p>Zygarde, the deity of order, and Watcher of the World. </p><p> </p><p>With an unchanging home for each of their cores and their vast knowledge from observing the place outside of their home, they were much more easier to access, and as many of their berthen, docile unless a dire situation were to happen.</p><p> </p><p>But was Zygarde even helpful to humans? There existed many stories of Pokemon being protected by them from the harm of evil humans, so it could possibly think like that. But that couldn’t be right, Zygarde had witnessed many honorable deeds that humans committed, and even rumored to fall in love with them. And even if they were willing to help, Gold had to traverse for many days through forest, valley, and desert, where the lair of a core of Zygarde lived. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> What choice do I have?” </em> he asked himself. “ <em> It’s tiring just to get food and keep a decent home. Might as well go to sleep and leave the next day.” </em></p><p> </p><p>Exhausted and left with no better plan left, he went to bed, with some hope in mind.</p><hr/><p>At the first crack of dawn, Gold woke up, and grabbed the satchel that laid in the back of the closet. Stuffing the essentials of the journey into the bag, he grabbed an apple for breakfast and left a hastily written note on the dining table for Crystal to see when she woke up to prepare the first meal of the day.</p><p> </p><p>He then rushed towards the market, buying the best Pokemon treats they had and a map, and set out to a harsh day of going through the valley and the desert, praying for a good end to it all.</p><p> </p><p>Finally, at noon, Gold saw a cave with the stylized green Z. He cried in his mind, “<em> Praise to you gods!” </em>and dashed into the cave.</p><p> </p><p>“Hello Zygarde!” he called into darkness.</p><p> </p><p>As his words returned back to him in an echo, two thick lines of green blobs appeared from each side of the cave and crept to the spot in front of him. The strange substance then rose from the ground until they were as tall as he was. Two stripes from the upper part of the strange substance stretched outwards, as if arms, and a part of it near the bottom sunk away, seemingly forming legs mostly covered by something. Four more stripes form from the top of the substance, with two of them fell down while the other two stood erect. Then, the blobs burst apart, revealing a very pretty woman with blue eyes and black hair, crowned with two green and black canine-like ears and covered in a black coat.</p><p> </p><p>“Whoa...I didn’t know that you would be hot.”</p><p><br/>“I can’t control fire completely, Father Grumbler,” she replied, her piercing green eyes keeping Gold’s from admiring further of her body. “I’m only a god of order and the earth.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Whoa! Even Zygarde knows me!” </em></p><p> </p><p>“Indeed I do,” she said as if she read his mind, cheerfully smiling. “You and your mate is quite a curiosity for me! How can such a woman still be of good health to work when her body struggled through excruciating pain so many times? How can a man be of great lust continue having more children despite the obvious consequences of it and such in a foul mood because of it?”</p><p> </p><p>Gold laughed awkwardly at such surprising bluntness. “Wow, that’s quite a reason to know me!”</p><p> </p><p>She nodded happily. “The human mind is always a big puzzle for me! Honestly, it’s a wonder why you make up such strange ideas like “money” and “labor” for the sake of food and water!” Her cheerfulness faded, giving him an interrogating expression. “But anyways, what are doing here in my cave?”</p><p> </p><p>“I want to know why I’m so unlucky!” he cried, dropping on his knees. “Does Xerneas or Death have anything against me!?”</p><p> </p><p>“I really can’t say for what my siblings think of you, but I can help you. Just give me some Poke Puffs or Beans.”</p><p> </p><p>“I have the best Poke Puffs right here!” he said, showing a bag of them to her. “Though they went stale from not being eaten quickly.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll take it. Stale Poke Puffs are better than none, plus, I ate Pokemon carcasses before,” she shrugged, before taking it from him. She then went deep into the cave, which was tempting for Gold to follow after, but for some reason, he kept still, possibly having a semblance of fear that Zygarde will punish him if he followed after.</p><p> </p><p>When she returned, she held a normal looking basket, made out of straw. He didn’t even feel anything magical coming from it.</p><p> </p><p>“This is a basket that Xerneas gave to me,” Zygarde said. “It will produce endless food that are very delicious, a meal that you wished for years but never had. All it takes for you to get them is to say “Little basket, little basket, do your duty.” When you want it to stop, say “That will do for today.” Do not reveal to everyone other than those you trust that you own this basket, and that it was I who gave it to you. Do you understand?”</p><p> </p><p>Gold nodded. “Yes ma’am!” He then snatched the basket out of her hands and went away, excited yet wary that perhaps the god was playing a trick on him, for he held fast to the belief that he was very unlucky throughout his life. He thought as he walked, “<em> Why would Zygarde be nice to me after all the other gods didn’t? Isn’t this all just a prank? What if she’s in her cave right now, laughing with all of her Pokemon friends on how much of a shmuck I am?” </em></p><p> </p><p>Not bearing the idea of being humiliated later on, Gold whispered to the basket, “Little basket, little basket, do your duty.” </p><p> </p><p>Nothing happened at first, other than strange shuffling from within the basket. He stared at it for a moment, anticipating something, before realizing the lid was still on.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh yeah!” he cried to himself, before opening it.</p><p> </p><p>Instantly, little white rolls came out of the basket, before the whole place was flooded with fish, all grilled, roasted, and cooked. Magikarp, Goldeen, Remoraid, Chinchou, and many more fish from many different lands he heard or never did flooded the place, endlessly flowed from the basket. When he realized that he couldn’t even see the horizon of the desert, he began to panic.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> OH SHIT! OH SHIT! HOW DO I STOP THIS!? Wait….oh yeah!” </em></p><p> </p><p>“That will do for today!” he cried.</p><p> </p><p>The basket snapped shut, stopping the production of the fish.The man then started gorging on the fish, enjoying the feast he was never able to enjoy for Dialga knows how long.</p><p> </p><p>When he was full, he thought, “<em> Man, the food was good, but I’m THIRSTY!” </em></p><p> </p><p>As if his thoughts had conjured it, he saw a tavern. He faintly remembered that it was miles away from where he was, but he didn’t care, running to the tavern as quickly as he can with a full stomach, before slamming the door open and crying. “GIVE ME THE BEST WINE YOU GOT!”</p><p> </p><p>The tavern keeper, who was cleaning the counter, stared at him with surprise, before saying, “Sir, that will come to–”</p><p> </p><p>He then ran over to the counter, and whispered, “And if your customers like fish, I have a whole lot of them! Just don’t tell anyone!”</p><p> </p><p>The tavern keeper summon a fireball in his hand, saying, “Sir–”</p><p> </p><p>“Little basket, little basket, do your duty!” </p><p> </p><p>The lid was lifted, instantly flooding the place with fish and a few rolls. The tavern keeper stared at bounty of food in awe that poured out so quickly in a few moments, before Gold said, “That will do for today! Now go pick them all up!”</p><p><br/>The tavern keeper did as he ordered, too stupefied to do anything else. But once he gathered some, he thought, “ <em> If I had this kind of basket, I could make a fortune! But I better figure out how to steal it…”  </em></p><p> </p><p>After he finished gathering up the fish and stored them, he went off to the cellar, getting as much of the best wine he had possible. Gold was enjoying having an actual seat for once, away from the hot desert that now is descending to freezing cold temperatures that only late autumn and winter at home brought. He didn’t need to sit without wine for long, as he quickly helped himself to it. </p><p> </p><p>The tavern keeper, hoping that the wine would make him spill the secret to where his basket came from, asked, “Say, that is a really useful basket. Can you tell me who gave it to you?”</p><p> </p><p>Gold may have been a grumpy man whose lust couldn’t be stopped by the obvious consequences and without any sort of control, whether magical, medical, herbal, or self inflicted, and while he certainly has his moments of major stupidity, he still possesses some intelligence. Instead, he replied, “More wine!”</p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, that lack of self control didn’t stop him from drinking so much that he fell asleep soundly soon enough. The tavern keeper, very quietly, went to his kitchen to find a basket similarly looking to the one Gold had, and placed it in his hand. When dinner time arrived, Gold woke up, and peeked out the window.</p><p> </p><p>“OH SHIT, I HAVE TO GO FEED EVERYONE!” he cried, grabbing the basket and running through the desert and back to the valley he came from.</p><p> </p><p>In surprising speed than his long trip in the morning, he returned home, where he saw his kids pushing with their wooden bowls over the basin of some of the very thin Goldeen soup. Crystal was watching them all when she saw her husband running like a mad man, and instantly, she put her hands on her hips and gave him a death glare that would have made Zygarde confuse her for their more deadly, winged sibling in a human woman’s form.</p><p> </p><p>“Gold, what is the meaning of this!?” she demanded.</p><p> </p><p>“Kids, you really shouldn’t be eating that kind of rubbish!” he said, waving his basket then opening it. “I got the best food here, and all I need to say is ‘Little basket, little basket, do your duty!’”</p><p> </p><p>All the kids turned to him, ignoring their fuming mother, in awe at their father’s words. They then repeated after him: “Little basket, little basket, do your duty!”. They kept doing this several more times, but nothing came out. When Gold turned it over, only a few scales of fish came out.</p><p> </p><p>“What is the matter with this thing!?” he snarled, continuing to shake it as if it will summon something. The children all stared wide-eyed, confused whether to laugh or cry from this. </p><p> </p><p>Crystal however, not taking lightly of standing there watching her husband leave her for an entire day for a frivolous reason or him pulling some sort of cruel prank, screeched, “Gold! Stop this insanity and stay here tonight and tomorrow and the days after! You running off to find more food had made us lose even more! Now wait until it’s your turn and eat!”</p><p> </p><p>“Wait...this basket might not even be mine!” Gold cried, then turned behind him, growling. “That damn tavern keeper!”</p><p> </p><p>He bolted back to town to buy some more Pokepuffs and Beans, ignoring the angry shouts of his wife and the pleading of his children, then dove back into the desert. When he finally found the tavern, he bursted open the door, startling the tavernkeeper.</p><p> </p><p>“Can I do anything for you...sir?” the keeper asked.</p><p> </p><p>“I have taken the wrong basket, by mistake of course,” Gold coldly replied, slamming the door behind him and walking menacingly towards him as he held the basket up. “Here is yours, can you give me back mine?”</p><p> </p><p>The keeper raised his eyebrow. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He then gestured to behind the counter. “You can see for yourself there is no basket here.”</p><p> </p><p>The keeper opened the door to let him in, and Gold stormed in, throwing things up for the basket. Unfortunately, there was not a single basket in sight.</p><p> </p><p>“Damn it!” Gold swore, then stormed out.</p><p> </p><p>The tavernkeeper anxiously smiled, then offered, “Sir, maybe you can like–” but Gold had already slammed the door on his way out.</p><p> </p><p>Gold ran so fast all the way to Zygarde’s cave that by the time he arrived, it was only about half an hour after the sun set and the sky was getting darker. </p><p> </p><p>He then yelled into the cave, “ZYGARDE!”, without regard that the creature he wanted to meet was the guardian of the entire world who could easily crush him with the earth or their own hand.</p><p> </p><p>Fortunately for him, Zygarde walked up to him in their canine form with a Poke Puff in their mouth. The dragon dropped the pastry into their paw, then transformed into their humanoid form. She sighed at the sight of him, then took another bite from her treat.</p><p> </p><p>“What is it that you want? I just gave you a really valuable treasure earlier today and now, your yelling had just woken up some of the napping Pokemon deep in my cave.” </p><p> </p><p>Gold pointed at the basket angrily. “This thing no longer works! It doesn’t conjure up a lot of food anymore!”</p><p> </p><p>“Well put it down, I got another gift from Diancie that’ll make you happy,” she replied, turning to go back into her cave. “Oh, and place the Poke Puffs and Beans down too.”</p><p><br/>Gold did as she did and crossed his arms, tapping his foot impatiently. A few moments later, the woman returned with a large Ducklett in her arms, quacking cheerfully.</p><p> </p><p>“This is a Ducklett that Diancie has blessed to produce a bounty of wealth and jewels. To get it, you must say ‘Show me what you can do, Ducklett!’” she said, then gave him a warning glare. “Do not lose this Ducklett, do not show his power to everyone, and above all, <em> do not </em> tell everyone I gave him to you. I’m not Hoopa, who can wander between worlds freely and collect any treasure that catches my fancy.”</p><p> </p><p>“What do you think I am, an idiot?” Gold scoffed. “Of course I won’t do any of that.”</p><p> </p><p>Zygarde’s eye twitched, which Gold took as to quickly take the Pokemon from her arms and put him in the basket he had before she decided to return to her more wild form. With a quiet “Goodbye”, he left and started running back home.</p><p> </p><p>Soon, he found the tavern again, strangely close by despite being in such a desolate location. He felt parched from his run, so he went in and called to the tavern keeper, “Good sir, I would like the best wine from your basement!”</p><p> </p><p>“Quack!” the Ducklett cried, his head a little above the basket’s lid.</p><p> </p><p>“That’s quite a fine Ducklett you got there,” the tavern keeper remarked, trying to not lick his lips at such a large Pokemon that would make a great feast.</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, I found it wandering in the desert here, as if its owner no longer wanted it,” Gold replied, hoping that he would buy his lie. </p><p> </p><p>The tavern keeper nodded in sympathy. “It’s a blessing from the gods that you saved it from certain death.”</p><p> </p><p>Gold then took a seat at a nearby table, and set the basket next to his leg. He pushed the lid down as much as he can without hurting the Pokemon, then whispered, “Show me what you can do, Ducklett.”</p><p> </p><p>The Ducklett started quacking loudly and pushed out of the lid, flapping his wings three times. Each time he quacked, gold drops and diamonds the size of peas dropped out of his beak.</p><p> </p><p>Gold glanced up at the tavern keeper, whose back was apparently turned to wipe the counters behind. He sighed in relief, then took some of the gold drops out and slammed it on the table, while putting away the others in his pocket. Unfortunately for Gold, the tavern keeper <em> did </em>see him bent down under the table, and already knowing that Gold has found a valuable treasure somewhere nearby the tavern before, he already had figured out the Ducklett was no ordinary one. </p><p> </p><p>“Here you go!” he called to the tavern keeper, who turned and saw the shiny stones. The tavern keeper’s eyes widened, then glared at him in suspicion and confusion. However, as it is a lot of money, he went down to the basement to find bottles of the best wine he can offer.</p><p> </p><p>He thought as he looked for it, <em> “That Ducklett would go along great with that basket! I’m sure it’s the one that magically made those gold drops, but if it doesn’t would make a great meal!” </em></p><p> </p><p>The tavern keeper soon went up with many bottles in his arms, setting them down on the table. He then went back in the kitchen to get a large cup and set it on the table. He poured a large amount of wine in, hoping that it would quickly get Gold to talk.</p><p> </p><p>Of course, Gold held his tongue but not his love for alcohol, and kept drinking glass after glass until he soundly fell asleep. The tavern keeper carefully pushed away a chair next to his patron, and picked up the basket. The Ducklett quacked in panic, but the keeper pushed the lid down, muting the quacks and straining the poor Pokemon’s neck. He tip-toed out of the front door and to his backyard, where his own yard of Duckletts was. He opened the lid and gently pushed the Ducklett out of the basket, then went off to find one that looked almost exactly like the one he had. He soon returned back to the tavern and placed the basket next to Gold’s leg.</p><p> </p><p>Several hours, Gold woke up in a daze and looked out the window. Much to his surprise, it was very dark out.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh fuck!” he cried, then glanced down at his basket to the Ducklett startled out of his sleep, quacking grouchily. He grabbed the basket, making sure the Ducklett is comfortable in there, and bolted out of the tavern and back home. Fortunately for Gold, as he was of Raichu spirit, he was able to summon a light bright enough to shine the way ahead.</p><p> </p><p>When he returned home, the sun was rising. He knocked on the door to be greeted by the sight of a furious Crystal, gripping on a ladle that could probably kill him.</p><p> </p><p>“Some good man you are to leave me all alone running and drinking at a tavern instead of taking care of <em> our </em> kids! You know that I'm unable to put enough food on the table without you!” she hissed, trying to keep herself from yelling and waking up their kids. “Do you have no sense of shame, Gold!?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, but I actually found a way to help us!” he retorted, holding up the Ducklett. “This Pokemon can help our situation! All I need to say is ‘Show me what you can do, Ducklett!’, and it’ll make great things!”</p><p> </p><p>“We have no time for pranks Gold!” she snarled. “Get your lazy ass into this house and help me cook for the kids!”</p><p> </p><p>Gold ignored her, then said to the Ducklett, “Show me what you can do, Ducklett!”</p><p> </p><p>The Ducklett quacked, but it didn’t pop out and flap its wings. Gold repeated those words again and again, each time growing louder. Finally, he was screaming at the Ducklett, which made it jump out of the basket and quack loudly and flap like a mad bird, which seemed to have made steam pour of Crystal’s ears. </p><p> </p><p>“Gold, stop that godsdamn Ducklett or I swear–”</p><p> </p><p>“Fine, fine!” Gold cried, then fired a lightning bolt at the Ducklett while it was flapping. Instantly, it dropped to the ground, steam flying a little above it. He then picked it up, and stuffed it into his basket. “I gotta go–”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re not going anywhere!” Crystal growled, her eyes glowing with dark blue aura. “You’re going to–”</p><p> </p><p>Gold remembered the precious diamonds and gold drops in his pockets, and pulled it out. Crystal stared at them in shock. “See!? My trips weren’t so bad!”</p><p> </p><p>Crystal glanced up at him furiously, then at the diamonds and gold drops curiously. “This can pay for more food in several months. Maybe an even better house. We can buy more land for farming…”</p><p><br/>She looked back up at him, an eyebrow raised. “How do I know this wasn’t stolen?”</p><p> </p><p>“Had I ever stolen while I was married to you?” he asked her, a sweet smile on his face.</p><p> </p><p>Crystal was not pleased with his response, but took the diamonds and gold drops gingerly. “Well...I’ll go and sell it later. But can you <em> please </em> stay here?”</p><p> </p><p>He shook his head towards the Ducklett. “I gotta figure out what’s up with this Ducklett. It’s the one that made those diamonds and gold drops you know.”</p><p> </p><p>Crystal was wary about the idea and considered it for several minutes. She finally nodded slowly. “If you must, Gold…”</p><p> </p><p>She then went back into the house to continue cooking for the family, leaving Gold to run to the bakery in fury. “What the hell happened to it!?” he asked to himself as ran. “I KNOW I remembered those words! It must be that godsdamn tavern keeper! I need to go back to Zygarde again!”</p><p> </p><p>This time he only bought Poke Beans from the bakery as it was the only thing available, and ran back to Zygarde’s cave. It was mid-morning when he arrived, panting, sweating, and furious with the slight.</p><p> </p><p>“ZYGARDE!” he screamed down the cave. “THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOUR DUCKLETT!”</p><p> </p><p>A few moments past without the Pokemon appearing. Gold yelled again, “ZYGARDE!”, no longer caring that he should give respect to the powerful Pokemon who gave him two treasures and kept the order of the world. Several minutes later, a very disgruntled woman with canine-like ears and a black coat walked up to him, rubbing her eyes and yawning.</p><p> </p><p>“What is it Gold?” Zygarde asked between yawns. “Even legendaries need to sleep too.”</p><p> </p><p>He pointed at the basket angrily. “YOUR basket and YOUR Ducklett doesn’t work! I said the correct magical words, and it does nothing!”</p><p> </p><p>She took a deep breath then sighed, rubbing her temples. “Isn’t it obvious, Gold? You’ve been tricked. Deceived. And ah...how does Hoopa say it? Bamboozled.”</p><p> </p><p>“BAMBOOZLED!?” Gold cried angrily.</p><p> </p><p>She gave him a very disappointed look, pointing at the basket and Ducklett. “My treasures are divinely blessed. There is absolutely no way they can’t just not work unless Xerneas or Diancie decides to take their powers back, but Xerneas is currently asleep and Diancie can only take back powers from objects or Pokemon if they’re right in front of them.”</p><p> </p><p>Realization dawned on Gold. He then growled, “It really is that gods damned tavern keeper!”</p><p> </p><p>She facepalmed. “I told you to not show it to anyone! But you know what? I’m feeling what I think you humans call “pity” and you have Poke Beans, so I’m going to give you one more chance.”</p><p> </p><p>She went back to her cave, then came out with an object that looked like a duster, an eerie smile on her face that made Gold a little less angry and more worried. “When you wish to dust a jacket of your own or of others, you got to say ‘Flack, flick, switch, be quick’, and you’ll see what happens.”</p><p> </p><p>A mischievous smirk formed on Gold’s face. He gave the beans to her, then took the duster respectfully and put it in his satchel. For once, he deeply bowed to Zygarde, and said, “Thank you, good Zygarde.”</p><p> </p><p>She nodded, the eerie smile still on her face. “Of course, good man.”</p><p> </p><p>Gold then bolted out of the cave, soon reaching the tavern. He bursted open the door and stormed up to the counter, scaring the tavern keeper who was cleaning his counter. </p><p> </p><p>“Hello there!” he greeted cheerfully, pulling the Ducklett up by the neck. “I would like you to cook THIS Ducklett, and nothing else! And make it quick! I’m famished!”</p><p> </p><p>The tavern keeper was a bit nervous at the order, and nodded slowly. “Okay sir–”</p><p> </p><p>He also slammed the basket down on the counter, an eerie smile on his face that resembled much ike Zygarde’s. “And I would like for you to lit THIS basket on fire for cooking, and nothing else! And when you’re done, I have something to show you from my jacket!”</p><p> </p><p>“Would you like some wine?” the tavern keeper asked carefully.</p><p> </p><p>He shook his head. “Water, and JUST water, please.”</p><p> </p><p>The keeper nodded, gingerly taking the Ducklett to roast it. He then served it to Gold, who spent the entire time grumbling because it was a bit too gamey to eat. When Gold was done eating, he slammed his hand on the table, and asked, “Now, bring me back my basket and Ducklett, right now, you hear?”</p><p> </p><p>The keeper wringed his hands anxiously. “Your Ducklett, and your basket? Sir, you just–”</p><p> </p><p>“MY basket, and MY Ducklett!” Gold demanded, risen from his seat. “And if you are too deaf to understand what that means, I have something to teach you!”</p><p> </p><p>He opened his bag, then cried, “Flack, flick switch, be quick!”</p><p> </p><p>The switch bursted out of the bag and started to attack the tavern keeper. The keeper screamed, but instead of red scratches forming on his face and arms, green, gooey stripes formed instead.</p><p> </p><p>“What the…” Gold muttered, but before he could ask what was happening, the switch attacked Gold too.</p><p> </p><p>“OW! OW! OW!” he cried, trying to flee from the switch, but the switch kept going after him. “Stop then, can’t you!? That will do for today!”</p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, the switch didn’t stop and kept attacking Gold and the keeper, whose body parts were now melting away into green goo. The walls, tables, and floors of the building were also slowly fading away into green goo. Gold tried to escape through the front door, but the switch always appeared in front of him and would whip his face. He could have been trapped there forever, buried under what appeared to be green goo as an angry switch attacks him, when everything around him suddenly disappeared. </p><p> </p><p>“Into my hand, quick!” a familiar voice cried, and the switch stopped, flying to the direction behind him.</p><p> </p><p>He turned around and saw Zygarde, clutching the switch as she approached him with a hard expression on her face, and a basket with a Ducklett in her other arm.</p><p> </p><p>“Z-zygarde?” Gold spluttered.</p><p> </p><p>“In the flesh,” she replied coldly. </p><p> </p><p>He pointed behind her, then to the side of where the wall was. “W-what–”</p><p> </p><p>“Do you think I would let a mortal walk away with some of my divine treasures I have without a trial?” she questioned.</p><p> </p><p>Rage swelled within Gold when he realized that all of this trickery and running and losing things were done by a cruel god. “So you wanted your treasures back!? You didn’t trust me!?”</p><p> </p><p>“There were many, many ways where you could have given away and used for gifts without a bad consequence,” she pointed out. “But your need to boast, whether subtle or not, overpowered your thinking. I have no more sympathy for you, and you have got what you deserved.”</p><p> </p><p>The rage melted away, as he realized that he was now doomed to the wrath of a powerful god. “So...I won’t get any of these treasures? I’ll have to face a life of more misfortune?”</p><p> </p><p>“I am not cruel nor have that power to curse you, for I see no need for it,” she simply said, then turned her back towards him and started walking. “I will find another human who will make the best use of their chances that are given to them.” She turned to him, giving him an angry, extremely disappointed glare that made his heart broke and run into a hole and curl up there at the same time. “But I know that it will <em> never </em> be you.”</p><p>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I know it's super weird if you read my stuff because Gold's not on crack for once and Emma's not being a Grade S bitch. But hey, at least they're a lot more chill.</p><p>Also, it always bothers me how the original fairy tale is like "Hey, what's a tavern doing here in the desert?" and then the tavern turns out to be normal instead of being an illusion of some sorts, so I used that concept there.</p><p>Father Grumbler in the original story came into this situation with nothing, and came out with nothing. Because it's super depressing and kinda doesn't make sense why Grumbler doesn't have some precious gems on him, the ending here is bittersweet, mostly bitter though.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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